I am a Christian girl and I want to ask something. Maybe Islam can show me the path and answers my questions, which are dwelling in my mind and I can't find any light and logic. I know making sex with boys is wrong and nowadays I despise myself that I did it. These days inside of me I feel a little depressed, because my boyfriend doesn't understand why I don't want to have sex and we are not good at although we had not much I'm confused, what does your religion say about sex?
However, in the case of Premarital sex and islam persons, there is no problem if the wife stimulates her husband's penis till the emission of semen Premafital the husband stimulates his wife's vagina till orgasm. Sometimes the scientists justify masturbation by saying that many people do it! Isn't the statement that "it is natural but not safe" a contradiction Premarital sex and islam itself? However, I must say that the groom should take the feelings of his bride into consideration; after all, she is new to him and to the surroundings. Raja'i 'l-matlubiyyah means doing something not because it is sunnat but with the intention that it might be expected of us to do so. It has been clearly condemned in the Bible and the Qur'an.
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The people, then, started to rebuke him and said, "shush, shush. Pre-marital sex is a sin punishable by the Islamic court. As a general rule, anyone who is your mahram is forbidden to you for marriage. That's why in my Maxim model trista I also wrote why is it wrong. Another hadith equates sex without foreplay to animal behavior: "When anyone of you has sex with his wife, then he should not go to them like Sex mult instead he should be slow Masturbation methods video delaying. The young man did not pay attention to any thing else thereafter. If u did not get that serious than he should ask your parents permission to marry you, but you should not be close to him until he is ready. This is not the place to discuss the legality or the illegality of the temporary marriage mut'a. B Is it discouraged makruh to have sex at any time or on any day? While describing the believers, the Qur'an says"The believers are Premarital sex and islam He give you the spouse who is best for you in this duniya, and who will inspire you towards jannah. I am using the term 'basic coital positions' for the positions known as the man Premarital sex and islam, face to face, woman above face to face; side position, face to face; rear-entry position in which the husband penetrates the vagina from the Premarital sex and islam. Views Read Edit View history.
For year-old Adji Mubarok, taaruf is the only way to get married.
- Although stoning for zina is not mentioned in the Quran, all schools of traditional jurisprudence agreed on the basis of hadith that it is to be punished by stoning if the offender is muhsan adult, free, Muslim, and having been married , with some extending this punishment to certain other cases and milder punishment prescribed in other scenarios.
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- This chapter deals with the practical side of sexual morality.
- I am a 19year old Muslim girl and I am in a relationship with a 21 year old Muslim boy.
For year-old Adji Mubarok, taaruf is the only way to get married. Once he turned to religion in , dating was no longer his thing. The last time he had a girlfriend was in 12th grade, and it only lasted three months. Adji left his hometown in Tangerang to move to Yogyakarta soon after he graduated from high school. Since then, he has decided to be closer to Allah. Adji wanted to find someone to marry.
He then listed everything he wanted in his ideal partner. Adji was matched with Fani, who is now his wife. They got married in early Taaruf is the practice of young, religious men asking clerics to help them find a woman. In his own experience, it took him a year to get to know his partner. During the taaruf process, they were not allowed to meet up without a guardian. Flirting was also prohibited. He thinks hijrah — or coming back to religion — and taaruf movements, have gained momentum in recent years, especially in big cities.
In , Tri Wahyu Nugroho started a website called rumahtaaruf. Rumah Taaruf was initially a subforum on the now-inactive site myquran. In the subforum, users exchanged their CVs to find prospective partners. Nugroho saw this as a great opportunity to make his own Rumah Taaruf website.
His purpose is to build a platform which is in line with Islamic teaching. The procedures are still essentially the same. Firstly, users upload their CV on the site. Nugroho said the meeting will be at a grand mosque near where the woman lives, with the assistance of Rumah Taaruf. If they feel chemistry, they can decide when to meet the family. According to Nugroho, 66 couples have been married since thanks to Rumah Taaruf. He can mediate four partners in one day.
He also says Rumah Taaruf never charges a penny for the mediation process. Rumah Taaruf is only one of many forums that offer taaruf services. He claims that the youngest members are 19 years old, and the oldest are 55 years old, but this is difficult to confirm. The concern of taaruf contributing to an increase in child marriages is only one of many other debates surrounding the practice.
But critics argue that taaruf targets young school age individuals, who are not mentally fit for marriage, and have no knowledge of sex education or reproductive health.
Other critics note that young married celebrity couples who are part of the movement to marry young, along with increasing conservatism in Indonesia, play a significant role in making taaruf a trend. The concern is further fueled by the hijrah movement's savvy use of social media to post eye-popping visuals and easy-to-understand religious quotes to attract young people.
But for youth like Adji, the criticism is unfounded. He contends that taaruf has served him well. In their first two years of marriage, Adji claims they had never encountered significant domestic problems.
I knew my wife only for a short time.
Is there any particular position for sexual intercourse which is forbidden in Islam? For example, the husband is not obliged to maintain the wife unless it has been so stipulated in the marriage contract. They still have to observe the rules of hijab. A Restrictions based on Relationship There are certain blood relations which are considered haram for you as far as marriage is concerned. If he repents and gives up that sin and seeks forgiveness, his heart will be polished.
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You wonder sometimes why this is so. Are people purposely trying to corrupt society? When it comes to freedom, religious people seem to have none, but those who corrupt young minds are free to do so under the pretext of freedom of opinion. In several European countries, the head cover is banned from public schools, universities, and government offices. It was narrated from Abu Hurairah may Allah be pleased with him that the Messenger of Allah peace be upon him said:. If he repents and gives up that sin and seeks forgiveness, his heart will be polished.
But if the sin increases, the black spot increases. In Islam, the only allowed physical relationship of any kind—including hugs, kisses, etc. So hugs or any other physical interaction are forbidden between couples who are not married. It is like walking on fire and expecting not to get burned.
As for engagement, we will need to understand what its purpose is, which is for couples to get to know each other in the hope to get married. However, engaged is not married. Commenting on this verse, Muslim scholars explain that those who seek fulfillment of their sexual desires outside the framework of marriage are deemed transgressors. This commandment is meant both for individuals and society as a whole. It warns each individual not only to guard against adultery or fornication itself but against all those things that lead to or stimulate it.
As regards society as a whole, the commandment enjoins us to make such arrangements to prevent adultery and eradicate the means and stimulants that lead to adultery.
Therefore, society should employ all those legal and educative means that help develop such an environment as prevents and eradicates indecency. Finally, there is no need to be depressed. Poor Best Rate it. For low bandwidth, click here to switch to audio-only stream. Click here to switch back to video. Key Points of This Video Premarital Sex in Islam Fornication is a sin all religion. Faith of the one who fornicates. Effect of promiscuity on society Aids. Security and Happiness that Islam brings.
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Faith Forum: Is sex before marriage OK?
This chapter deals with the practical side of sexual morality. We will first talk about marriage at the age of puberty, followed by a look into the possible ways unlawful as well as lawful of handling sexual urge if one decides not to marry soon after puberty, and finally the marriage procedure and sexual techniques will be discussed comprehensively.
It is necessary to mention that the last part of this chapter is very explicit because religious do's and don'ts have to be spelled out in very clear terms.
As the saying goes, "There is no room for shame haya' in [learning or asking about] religion. Sexual desire is aroused in human beings at the age of puberty. In Islamic legal definition puberty bulugh is determined by one of the following:. Internal change in boys only : The first nocturnal emission. This is known as nocturnal emission wet dream or ihtlam in Arabic.
Since the sexual urge begins at puberty and as Islam says that sexual urge should be fulfilled only through marriage, it has allowed marriage as soon as the boy and the girl reach the age of puberty. In the case of girls, it not only allows them to be married as soon as they become mature, but also recommends such marriage.
It is based on such teachings that Islam discourages girls from postponing their marriage because of education; instead, it says that girls should get married and then continue their education if they wish to do so.
Physical maturity by itself, however, is not enough for a person to handle the marriage responsibilities; rushd maturity of mind is equally important. On the other hand, our present way of life has become so much complicated that a considerable gap has appeared between puberty and maturity both in financial and social affairs.
A recent article on the American youths says, "Young Americans entering the 21st century are far less mature than their ancestors were at the beginning of the 20th. The difference is evident in all areas of youthful development: sex, love, marriage, education and work. Physically, today's youths are maturing earlier than previous generations, but emotionally they are taking much longer to develop adult attachments.
What can the Muslims do about their next generation? In spite of the problem mentioned above, I believe there are ways by which Muslim youths in their late teens can get married without worrying about the financial aspect. Here I can suggest four possibilities If the parents are well to do and can support their young married children till they are financially independent, then I would strongly suggest that they encourage their children to marry and support them till they can stand on their own feet.
While talking about the contract of freedom made between a slave and his master, the Qur'an says,. If Islam puts so much emphasis on financially supporting one's freed slave so that he may stand on his own feet, it is needless to say how virtuous it would be to help one's own children to stand on their feet!
On a broader level, the Muslim organizations should create funds e. Once a person guilty of indecent sexual behavior was brought to Imam 'All. After punishing him, the Imam arranged for his marriage at the expenses of the government.
The Imam set an example of how the society can help the youths in starting a family life. By looking at the situation in the Western world, the Muslim organizations should at least morally feel obliged to provide such support for their youths. This is not a matter of charity; it is a matter of surviving as a Muslim community in a morally hostile environment. The boy and the girl can do their 'aqd Islamic marriage contract but postpone the marriage ceremony till after they have finished their education.
In other words, they would be married but still staying with their parents. They can meet each other without any shar'i objection; and if they decide to have sexual relations, then they should use permissible contraceptive means to delay the child-bearing process.
In this way, they would be able to fulfil their sexual desire and be free from financial responsibilities.
The boy and the girl can do their 'aqd and even the marriage ceremony but delay the child-bearing process and adopt a very simple life-style. Thus they will be able to fulfil their sexual desire and also be free from heavy financial burden. However, I cannot overemphasize the importance of the role played by parents in supervision of all such arrangements.
I would not at all support the idea that a boy and a girl decide such matters on their own without the parents' input or without registering such arrangements at the community center. This will protect the reputation of the girl in case things do not work out properly. They will have to adopt a very simple life-style.
If today's youths intend to have a 'standard' financial footing before getting into marriage, then it will not be possible in the late teens; they will have to wait till they are in their thirties! The article mentioned above says that the youths "are marrying later than their parents did partly for economic reasons and many college graduates are postponing marriage beyond age One important benefit of these suggestions is that a youngster of college age will be free from sexual anxieties and will be able to concentrate fully on his or her studies.
If a Muslim youth raised in the Western society without any religious upbringing is not provided with financial and moral support by his parents, then he is at risk of melting into the permissive culture that tolerates teenage sex outside marriage.
And if this happens, God forbid, the youth will no longer regard a sexual relationship as a matter of value or commitment. And this type of sexual behavior has serious social consequences: abortions, unwanted babies, increase in divorce ratio and single parent families.
Add to this the emotional suffering the people in general and the children in particular go through in such crises. If a person cannot marry soon after becoming sexually and mentally mature, then how should he or she handle the sexual urge?
In this section we will survey some ways of fulfilling the sexual urge and see whether they are permitted by Islam or not. Pre-marital sex is absolutely forbidden in Islam, no matter whether it is with a girl-friend or a prostitute. Pre-marital sex is fornication zina.
It is also an irresponsible sexual behavior; there is no responsibility involved in such relationships. Statistics can overwhelmingly prove that man has often cheated innocent women in pre-marital sex. Today half of all American men and women in their thirties cohabited before marriage, many of them on the assumption that it is better to look deeply before they leap. Glen Elder, a sociologist at University of North Carolina, has this to say about cohabitation: "It's a relationship that attracts those, mainly men, who are looking for an easy way out and it is uncertain what, if anything, it contributes to marriage.
The line [in a previous letter] that struck home was from the teenager who said she knew lots of girls her age who had several partners 'just for the fun of it. Sleeping with guys wasn't exciting or thrilling, it was degrading. It made me feel lonelier and emptier than ever. I also worried from month to month about being pregnant.
That can be a real hell It doesn't make a girl feel loved. It makes her feel cheap. Do not go near adultery, surely it is an indecency, and an evil way [of fulfilling sexual urge]. Fornication and adultery have severely been condemned in the saying of the Prophet and the Imams. In Islam, pre-marital sex is considered an immoral act against the rights of Allah and one's own sexual organs.
Pre-marital sex is a sin punishable by the Islamic court. If an unmarried man and an unmarried woman are found guilty of fornication in an Islamic court, their punishment will be as the following:. The woman and the man who fornicate scourge each of them a hundred whips; and in the matter of God s religion, let no tenderness for them seize you if you believe in God and the Last Day; and let a party of the believers witness their punishment.
The shari'ah says that married persons guilty of adultery should be stoned to death. In Islamic terminology, masturbation istimna means self-stimulation of the sexual organ till one achieves emission of semen or orgasm. Masturbation in form of self-stimulation is forbidden in Shi'ah fiqh. While describing the believers, the Qur'an says ,.
The last sentence makes it very clear that any sexual gratification outside marriage is considered a transgression of the law of God. And this verse also implies that sex is an act in which two people are involved. Once when Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq was asked about masturbation, he recited this very verse and mentioned masturbation as one of its examples. Masturbation is a sin for which a person can also be punished by the Islamic court.
Of course, the nature of the punishment is upon the judge's discretion. Once a person was caught masturbating and was brought to Imam 'Ali. The Imam punished him by beating on his hands until it turned red; then he made arrangement for his marriage on government's expenses. These days some scientists are telling us that there is no harm in masturbation; rather it is a natural act. To prove that it is natural, they give examples of some wild animals, like monkeys.
Actually they represent those who have gone to the other extreme of sexual morality. They have degraded human beings to the level of wild animals, and then justify their deeds by finding examples in the animal world. They are, in Qur'anic expression,. The irony is that when Muslims talk about following Islam which came just years ago, they are labeled by the secularists as 'reactionaries,' 'those who want to turn the clock backwards,' 'anti -progress,' and now these very people are going millions of years back according to their own counting and following the wild animals or the primitive societies to determine what is natural for us and what is not natural!
Many different types of sexual behavior could be found in primitive societies, but that does not automatically make it natural or right. On the contrary, in some cases, masturbation was considered an abnormal and abhorrent act! For example, Lewis Cutlow writes about the Amazon Indians that:.
Xinguanos are deeply disturbed by civilizados who are sexually frustrated; they cannot understand how a man can become aroused at the sight of a nude woman.
In his 25 years of daily life with Indians, Orlando told me, he had never seen an Indian with an erection. It would be absurd to them. Nor has Orlando seen or heard any instances of sexual deviation among the Indians.
They did not know what masturbation was until they saw a civilizado telegraph operator doing it. From then on the telegraph operator was a problem to Orlando and his colleagues at the Park.
The Indians despised him because, in their eyes, he had done something reprehensible. There was nothing to do but remove him from the Park. Sometimes the scientists justify masturbation by saying that many people do it! But if a majority does something, it does not automatically prove that it is right. Otherwise, drugs should also be declared 'normal' because the majority of Americans, at one time or another took drugs. The surveys made by sexologists like Kinsey, Masters and Johnson, and the Hite Report just reveal what the American people do in the privacy of their bedroom; it does not necessarily prove that what they do is natural and right!
Many modern psychologists say that masturbation is just like normal sexual intercourse, rather even better because you are master of yourself, you don't have to worry about your partner's feelings!